Monday, 30 September 2013


I regret it with every fibre of my existence. I feel the wealth of emotions surging up inside me, swelling up and they burst out into uncontrollable flames. The feeling doesn't subside, or at least it hasn't yet. I feel this every second of everyday. I know it was all my doings but I can not help but wonder if I was not  so stubborn what would life be like now.

They say the pain makes you stronger, that you learn from the most painful experiences but I haven't seen the light of day yet. It's hard to when that person feels so close yet so far....

One thing that I try to remember is that it's in the past and that for matters of the heart sometimes there is no closure and I need to be okay with that.

I  have come to realise that it's my own fault, but  I won't continue to beat myself up for it- which is really hard but I can not be too hard on myself. Seek to learn the lesson behind every mistake you make and learn it !

On the one hand you long to be special to that one person who you hold in such high esteem but you have got to realise that someone really special will easily see what is special in you. If they don't SEE IT then you deserve way better.....even when you may feel like this is heaven ...they are not obligated to feel the same........What once was does not exist anymore and even though it hurts like your innards have been crushed and pulverised by a large Goliath. You need to move on, you need to let it go!

Heart Follower

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