Saturday 14 December 2013

Why I am scared of falling in love......



I remember distinctly reading ''The Strange case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde'' , for me it was an eye opener. I suddenly saw with such clarity. That book impacted me in such a way that I can read people with great accuracy without knowing much . From this book I begun to note that many people wear masks and that sometimes the person you think you know on the outside is not who that person really is. It hit home for me because I realised I knew people who were like this-two different people. Now I realise you may be getting bored with this so you are more than welcomed to stop reading now but you will miss out on the lesson in the story here.
I noticed that for some people  love meant saying it once in a while and for others it meant showing it everyday. Now mind you people do show there love in different ways but to me just saying it was not hitting the mark. Words mean nothing if it is not backed up by the way you treat another person. Yes there are others ways to show love and yes the way you show it is different for each person  but to me you ought to say less and mean more!
Love is not about manipulation, control, anger or jealousy. Love does not live on such. It's not about using the person to meet your own ends. It's about compromise and it's also about ensuring that the other person does not have to live in your shadow. I don't believe in the statement that'' Behind every great man is a great woman'' That's preposterous! It implies that men get all the glory and attention whilst women do all the propping and the actual work. Why can't it be side by side huh? This is not equality nor a world I should like to live in. I guess what I am most scared of is not being alone, I actually quite enjoy my own company but to fall in love with someone who for the life of me is just an emotional vampire. Let me clarify  I don't fear commitment I think that part comes naturally when you care abut someone. I just fear falling in love because it's  so hard to say goodbye to someone who you love and you know is not good for you yet you keep going back like a helpless flightless bird because the love is holding you there. Love really does make you do crazy things and I know it's kind of asking a lot of the universe to say hey when I do fall in love make sure  it's not with an a-hole or a man who won't treat me like I deserve to be treated. But you ought to believe you deserve better than that. Don't fall for someone who is not determined to show you exactly what you mean to them. They should never let a day go by without showing you how much they care. If they fail to show it you better believe it does not exist because someone who cares will show it, every decision they make will take you into consideration.
I now have come to believe that there is absolutely no need to search for love because there is and always will be enough love within me. I believe that there is no such thing as a man shortage. Because as soon as one man decides to leave another man comes along much like buses. I  hold fast to the belief that inspite of all my short-comings I am and forever will be inherently and irrevocably good enough. Nothing and no man can change that! In fact  my worth is not even dependant on anything at all- I am just simply worthy regardless. That's why falling in love is no longer on my radar I am letting the universe handle that now!

xoxoxo
Heart Follower

5 comments:

  1. I really enjoyed this piece. Spoken like a woman with sheer and profound confidence

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  2. a woman who also knows her own mind

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  3. Gosh :$ .... Thanks guys :) <3

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  4. i like...i believe if you need a man to define or validate who or what you are you're not ready for life.

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    1. Indeed we must fill ourselves with love before we can fill another. Validation always starts within and with each individual ought to set themselves on fire by allowing their unique energy to be expressed, only then can we get someone that complements our soul purpose.Thanks for visiting my site and I hope you will come again. :)

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